Thursday, February 26, 2015

Frozen buns and weiner

Yesterday I went outside for a walk. What a difference a week makes… 

Last week: sneakers, shorts and t-shirt

This week, Boots, leopard underwear, pants, t-shirt, pull-over, coat, gloves and a tuque! 

This is what happens when you leave Florida in the middle of winter for our perma-frost land of never-ending-winter-hell named Canada! 

As it always happens on those strolls, my mind was traveling in time… 

I remembered when we were in our early twenties; my wife and I attended a course on the military base in Kingston (Ontario). It was in winter and we had rented a small cabin in the outskirt of the base. Our neighbors were Leo and J9 (not really part of the story but I felt like throwing their names in, in case they read this :) ) 

Before cabin fever set-in, I decided to go for a run. I was in great shape and could pound the pavement forever. 

It was cold with a little wind so I wore shorts, sweat pants and a wind breaker. Usually when running in the cold is not an issue as long you wear the proper clothing. I thought I did… 

The cabin was located on a major road. There was no where else for me to jog so I ran on the road, with the wind in my back. I might have run a mile or two. By the time I turned for my return leg, I had buns of steel; they were so frozen! 

Now running with the wind in my face, I felt really exposed (below the belt). When I finally arrived at the cabin, my front apparatus were all frozen. I could have gotten a vasectomy right there and then; I would not have felt a thing. But we wanted to have kids, so I just let every thing thaw slowly. Luckily nothing was frozen so much that it fell off! 

Needless to say, that was the last time I ran outside in the winter.


  1. Hahahaha! This was funny. How I even managed to read the whole post is a miracle cause I had a hard time getting past the "leopard underwear" that you mentioned. It's bring to mind a very entertaining image!

    1. Sorry Martha no picture! I wouldn't want to have jealous husbands chasing me LOL

  2. You need to add a trigger warning to your posts: "Not safe for my kids to read!"

    - WWE

    1. Dear WWE, it's the mission of every parents to send their kids on the sofa of psychologist. This is a big secret but we get a finders-fee from them. :)

  3. Hi Richard, Found your blog today! Sorry it took this long. You have a funny sense of humor. I think that great attitude has *everything* to do with great health habits, so you have that going for you. Watch out for legsicles when running in Canadian winter. :-)

    1. Welcome Marion, I think life is a really serious business, but there is absolutely no reason not to have fun too!

      Don't worry too much about my legs... ha ha ha